Walking Side by Side

In companionship we position ourselves next to not across from, both literally and figuratively. We are all aware of how physical position can be used negatively. Have you ever walked into your boss's office, a person who never moves past the other side of the desk? Or visited a bank to talk about a loan? What a difference it makes in the conversation when the "other" (who already carries a superior status of authority) joins you in a chair next to you. This doesn't mean you don't look people in the eye...you do to enforce that you are a presence with them. But you also look in the same direction that person looks to see the same things physically and possibly emotionally. You can find it easier to empathize sometimes when you are not focused physically on the person, staring at them intently. That staring can disrupt the listening. We'll talk more about that later!

"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up the other." (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10a)

I once heard pastoral counseling described as offering to take your boat alongside another's to go out into deep water. You don't get in their boat, but you stay nearby in your own. If the other sinks, you are alongside and safe to help.

Companionship: Offering Hospitality

Better is a dinner where love is, than a fatted ox with hatred in it. Prov. 15:17.

In the book Souls in the Hands of a Tender God, Craig Rennebohm lists "offering hospitality" as one of the four key components of companionship. Companionship comes from the Latin cum panis, with bread. "Sharing even the most humble meal,"says Rennebohn (p. 72), can be a sacred act. In all known cultures, enjoying food and refreshment is an expression of kindness and friendship, a sign of grace and true welcome. "

Another definition relevant of the practice of hospitality is what Henri J. M. Nouwen in his book Reaching Out calls "free and friendly space for the stranger." To practice companionship we try to create a space that is sacred, a place where we are free to accept one another for what we are, what we seek, what we believe, and what concerns us. This space needs to be safe and free of judgment.

A Prayer for Welcome: by Richard Gilbert

We bid you welcome, who come with weary spirit seeking rest,
Who come with troubles that are too much for you,
Who come hurt and afraid.

We bid you welcome, who come with hope in your heart,
Who come with anticipation in your step,
Who come proud and joyous.

We bid you welcome, who come seeking a new faith,
Who come to probe and explore,
Who come to learn.

We bid you welcome who come to this hall as a homecoming,
Who have found here room for your spirit,
Who find in this people a family.

Whoever you are, whatever you are, wherever you are on your journey,
We bid you welcome.

(found on the Unitarian Universalists of Puerto Rico web site (http://www.uupuertorico.org/)